did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize