go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
