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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.

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• (209): View more from California

  We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem

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• 

  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (904): View more from Florida

  all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.

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• (619): View more from California

  yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work

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• (253): View more from Washington

  At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?

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• (818): View more from California

  I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...

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