I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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