So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
