So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
