Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i wish my penis had a tongue
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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