wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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