I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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