I want to make a zoo with you.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I wear drunk well.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
