are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
