never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
