i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize