what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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