WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
