Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize