fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
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