He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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