I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize