I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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