Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Randomize
