4 words: hood of his car
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
