do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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