My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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