I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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