Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
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