i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
We are two peas in an std pod
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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