You made me cry and you don't even care
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
