I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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