Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
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