She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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