i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
