Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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