doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize