CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
