Where is the hickey?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
