Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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