id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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