the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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