Fine. I'll sleep in my office
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize