what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
This house was built for laser tag.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
