so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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