My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize