And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
