theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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