Got a toothbrush?
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I have aggressive nipples.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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