this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
