im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
My feet surprised me
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