Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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