so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Randomize
