Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Randomize
